Think Spring!

I am all settled in at chemo. I have a window seat, and the sun is shining. The trees outside are flowering. Signs of Spring are everywhere, but it’s freezing in the room! I have my aunt’s quilt on my lap, and I have my puffer vest tucked under my legs for some extra warmth! I have my nurse from Minnesota today; she’s super nice (of course!). I have been feeling great lately. I’m not thinking about cancer other than when I’m writing my devotional. If I can write every day this week, I’ll have it finished at the end of this week. I’m really happy with how it has come together. My scan is coming up next month. I don’t have a date/appointment yet. I’ll have it next time I write. And for the first time, I am feeling dread. I don’t want to know what’s going on; I don’t want anything to change. I want remission to last for years. My bloodwork and organ function is good, so I should feel good going into it, but I feel like the time I let my guard down, I will get bad news. So, at this point, I am cautiously optimistic. I am also dreading how I’ll feel the next few days after chemo. I usually feel blah – tired and nauseated – for a few days after chemo now. I need to learn to accept it still and listen to my body and rest. It’s a small price to pay for how many good days I have in my cycle, a small price to pay for life.

My mom painted the flowers above. I’m not posting an inspirstional qoute today. Thought I’d share her art because instead because I think Spring is so inspiring. It’s my favorite season. Everything is full of life, and that is how I’m feeling lately.

I will write again in two weeks from chemo, and I’ll let you know when my scan will be. Happy Spring! Stay safe and healthy, everyone!