Feeling Fully Alive Again
I had some bloodwork and, thus, a port flush earlier this week. I was kind of nervous for the results because my cancer markers needed to be low to give me confidence that I will still be in remission for Italy this fall. I got my results quickly, and not only were my cancer markers low, but I was within normal ranges of everything tested – not even a vitamin deficiency! I am soooo happy with the results. The data keeps showing that my health just continues to get better, as evidenced by me in how good I feel!
Next up is a chest CT scan today. I am feeling pretty confident about it since my cancer markers were low. Not my favorite scan as you have to lie face down on your stomach and can’t see anything, but I’ll just try to relax and enjoy some peace. It also is not the most comfortable test for me either since I have to lie on my chest with my arms over my head, and it’s kind of a painful, uncomfortable pose to hold because my skin is tight from radiation. I think swimming will be good for that. I can’t swim with my right arm fully stretched out, but I think it would get better with regular swimming.
Well, today’s scan, if it comes back normal, will help me relax and thoroughly enjoy Italy. I will feel good and strong, able to walk all over the place, and I’ll be able to go having my full head of hair, not looking or feeling like a cancer patient. Although cancer can be hiding somewhere else, anywhere else in my body, getting a clear scan today would mean I could also relax a bit going into my next PET scan in November since we’ll have, at least, ruled out cancer in one area, the area of original diagnosis. I will still have scanxiety in November, though. I thought the longer I’ve been off treatment, the more hopeful and confident I would feel going into the next PET scan, but I’m actually nervous thinking that the longer I’m off treatment, the possibility of it coming back gets closer. How long can I fend it off? But then I really try to believe I have been given a miracle and that I will be just fine If I continue to have faith, hope and trust.
I might write after my scan as I wait through the weekend for my results, but my daughter is visiting from college, so I may wait to write again till after my appointment with my oncologist next Wednesday.
In the meantime, stay safe and healthy, everyone!